


If Michael Had Been Late

by uaigneach



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Angst, Michael Needs a Hug, Overdosing, Pining Michael, SQUIP uses he/him and it, Sad Ending, Suicide, Suicide Attempt, and Jeremy was desperate, just saying, musical verse, read the tags for warnings, this is basically what would happen if Michael didn't have such great timing, too lazy to go back and fix it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-08
Updated: 2017-07-08
Packaged: 2018-11-29 13:47:05
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,386
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11442153
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/uaigneach/pseuds/uaigneach
Summary: My imagining of what would happen if Michael hadn't arrived when he did, but around 15 minutes later. A lot can happen in 15 minutes, and it will haunt Michael to the end of his days.orJeremy commits suicide to escape his SQUIP.





	If Michael Had Been Late

**Author's Note:**

> idk why I wrote this... but i was talking about the musical with my friend and I was like "hey! what if this was angstier?" and this is what happened. It was supposed to be shorter...

“Alcohol messes you up, right? I’ll - get drunk!” he yells, desperation colouring his voice.

 

And he was desperate. He didn’t know what he was doing or how on earth he was supposed to fix this. It had just been some stupid wish to make himself popular. Or really, to just stop being a loser. Christine noticing him would only be a bonus

 

 _“And I’ll be back when you’re sober. Unless you plan to stay wasted forever?”_ The SQUIP raised a singular eyebrow at him, showing how unimpressed he was with the level of intelligence that Jeremy was showing.

 

Jeremy was desperate. His world was falling apart and he didn’t know what to do. Only a couple months ago, his biggest concern was passing his classes and pining for Christine. “You’re a computer. There has to be some way to turn you off!” The SQUIP shook his head and sighed. Talking to Jeremy was apparently becoming an arduous task.

 

_“I’d stop there. You don’t want to end up like Rich.”_

 

That struck a chord with Jeremy. The memory was kind of hazy due to the slight buzz that he’d had from Chloe’s alcohol shit mix, but it was clear enough for him to notice some details. Rich had been kind of messed up by the end of the party, and it hadn’t been from alcohol or pot; or so Jenna Rolling claimed.

 

Rich had been running panicked around the house, asking people for something. But he couldn’t remember what it was. But… maybe he’d said something? What had it been? The last hour of the party flipped through his head like an old black and white film, zooming in on Rich and all of his interactions until one moment seemed to stick out to him.

 

_“I NEEEED MOUUUUTAIN DEEEEW REEEEDDD!”_

 

It was a distant yell that hadn’t really registered at the time, but for some reason Jeremy’s muddled brain had picked up on it. But… wait…

 

“That’s it.” he muttered, suddenly realizing _why_ it was important. “Green Mountain Dew activates you. Red shuts you off.” he exclaimed excitedly. That was the answer. He could stop everything and save the others who’d been SQUIPed.

 

He wouldn’t end up like Rich.

 

The SQUIP smirked in triumph, _“Why do you think we had it discontinued? To get rid of me now, you’d need a time machine to the 1990’s.”_ He was utterly confident in the fact that he would win. That Jeremy wouldn’t be able to stop him.

 

“Or a friend who’s so old school, he buys 90’s soft drinks from the back room at Spencer’s Gifts!” Jeremy countered. It was a valid point, there would always be someone selling whatever was discontinued. Sure it would be at an inflated price, but if it would stop the SQUIP and get him his life back, it would be worth it.

 

The SQUIP’s smug smirk turned a bit more sinister and cruel. _“Too bad you don’t have one of those. Anymore.”_ His grin was all teeth and none of his former charm remained. He looked so sinister and obviously _off_ that Jeremy really wondered why he’d trusted the computer in the first place.

 

It was a program! Why would it actually know what was best for him? Running endless algorithms doesn’t account for human emotion or human error and mistakes. That’s why AI’s are ever going to work. It’s probably why the SQUIP was so hush hush in the first place.

 

But he needed Mountain Dew Red and the only person who he knew could get it to him in time to make a difference was Michael. He frantically grabbed his phone out of his back pocket and began trying to dial in the number that he knew even better than his own.

 

But because nothing in Jeremy’s life could be easy, the SQUIP wouldn’t let him. Just like at the Halloween party before the incident in the bathroom, the SQUIP took complete control over his body. He couldn’t control his limbs, and he’d been frozen just before he could enter the final number.

 

Then his arm spasmed and his phone was effectively launched across the room, smashing to pieces against the brick walls of the school. He groaned in frustration as his muscles locked for a second before the SQUIP released his control.   


The SQUIP frowned at him in mock disappointment. _“Now, now, we can’t have that. That would just mean more disappointment wouldn’t it, Jeremy.”_ He lectured, talking to him like he was a small child who had tried to eat pure sugar. _“You remember what you last said to Michael, don’t you? I don’t think he’d be all that excited to do you any favours after what you said.”_

 

Jeremy’s blood ran cold. His brain had been pretty messed up from whatever shit mix Chloe had been drinking, however it was far from the first time he’d gotten drunk. He had a surprising tolerance for someone who was visibly a light weight. He’d still had some of his wits about him. Tipsy at worst considering it was only a couple sips of the rancid debilitating liquid.

 

But he’d been struck by irrational anger at Michael’s words. He couldn’t understand why Michael couldn’t just be happy for him and accept that maybe Jeremy wasn’t going to be lame anymore. Maybe Jeremy was popular and he had actual friends now. Plural; as in more than one. Something he’d dreamed of since 3rd grade when him and Michael had been unknowingly declared the bottom of the ladder by everyone in the school.

 

 **“Get out of my way.** **Loser** **.”**

 

He’d known that Michael had had self worth issues for a long time now. He’d never been one of the cool kids; people had always picked on him. Starting with his dad. Michael had never been good enough for Mr. Mell, so it was no surprise that being called a loser was something that hurt Michael deeply. And Jeremy had gone and fucked up.

 

He’d known that, and yet, he’d still crossed that line.

 

With his phone gone and no possible way for him to contact Michael, he didn’t know what to do. He patted frantically at his pockets as he tried desperately to find a solution and ignore the sinister cackling of the SQUIP. There was nothing other than lint, a pen with the cap chewed beyond recognition, and… his anxiety pills.

 

It would come as no surprise to anyone that Jeremy had been diagnosed with a pretty severe anxiety disorder after his mother left and his dad gradually stopped leaving the house and even wearing pants altogether. He’d been taking medication for his panic attacks and other anxiety issues since he’d been diagnosed, and he’d always made sure to bring his pills with him.

 

(Michael also kept some with him in case Jeremy ever needed it and he didn’t have his own with him.)

 

But this could work. He had no way of calling Michael, and Michael was the only way to get Mountain Dew Red in time. It wasn’t like he had any other options anymore. He was just hoping that this would actually work.

 

 _“It’s useless resisting, Jeremy. I’m going to improve your life if I have to take over the entire student body to do it.”_ The SQUIP’s voice was distorted and angry as his ghostly image seemed to distort in front of Jeremy. He glitched and faded from view at random intervals, almost like a computer virus. Why was the SQUIP even interested in Jeremy’s quality of life? Why was that a thing?

 

But he didn’t really have time to figure it out. No one was coming to save him. He was alone.

 

The SQUIP began to advance on him and he pulled the small translucent orange bottle of pills out of his pocket. It was still three quarters of the way full, considering his panic attacks had been getting better lately (his dad had finally gotten a job, so it was a considerable weight off of his shoulders) and he’d just gotten a refill about 4 months before all this SQUIP nonsense had started. The SQUIP paused as he stared at Jeremy in confusion.

 

 _“Your panic attacks have lessened, Jeremy. You have no need for that while I am here. I’ve blocked all of your rising panic since I’ve been here. Haven’t I done a good job?”_ The SQUIP cocked his head to the side, his glowing motionless eyes seemingly staring at his very soul. Jeremy gulped nervously as he shakily opened the bottle, nearly dropping the bottle in the process.

 

SQUIP should be able to know what he was thinking; he’d need to act fast.

 

It was his SQUIP that had started everything. If he killed his SQUIP, then all the others should die to. If not… well Michael was smart. He’d figure it out.

 

Without even bothering to psych himself he dumped the contents of the bottle into his mouth and swallowed. It would take him 10 minutes before he was dead from lack of oxygen

 

(He’d done his research way back when. Overdoses were messy and his dad had been terrified that Jeremy would have some unwanted side effect from Xanax. The doctor had reassured him that it was one of the safer drugs with minimal chance of overdose or addiction. However, he warned him that it was still possible. Jeremy hadn’t believed it would ever come to this, but here he is.)

 

No one was coming - unlike last time - and he would do his darnedest to prevent himself from vomiting. He wasn’t about to let the SQUIP win. He stared defiantly at the still glitching hallucination in front of him as he felt his breathing began to slow.

 

It was getting harder to concentrate and his breaths were coming in shallower and shallower. He felt like there was cotton balls in his brain and his vision began to black out around the edges. The SQUIP who used to look so composed was now beginning to panic, his eyes wide as he rushed towards Jeremy.

 

 _“What have you done!”_ He yelled. He continued to yell, breaking into Japanese as the computer became more and more flustered. But Jeremy couldn’t hear him. It was like his brain had gone quiet. He couldn’t even hear himself think. The only thing that was making audible noise was his slowing heartbeat and his breaths.

 

They were deafening in the new silent world. He couldn’t tell how much time had passed, but his vision was fading, and his breathing had stopped altogether. Only his heart continued to beat, it’s pounding like that of a war drum. He slowly fell to the ground, settling against the cool tile face first.

 

He was so tired. He closed his eyes. In the distance, he vaguely heard the sound of footsteps. He wondered who it could possibly be. Right before he fell unconscious, he heard a deafening wail, quickly followed by a chorus of pained shrieks.

 

* * *

 

“MICHAEL MAKES AN ENTRANCE”

 

Michael yelled as he kicked open the door, almost immediately regretting it as he dropped his bottle of Mountain Dew Red on the ground and clutched his ankle, all the while cursing up a storm. “Fuck that was a mistake,” he groaned loudly before looking around the room, picking up the bottle almost absentmindedly.

 

At first it had almost looked like he’d made his dramatic entrance around the wrong room. Before he was able to gather his wits about him, there was suddenly a long drawn out wail of agony coming from the stage, quickly followed by more wails as there were a cluster of thumps. Michael whipped around to stare behind him at the noise.

 

It was very obviously the people who were currently on stage or about to be on stage. The popular kids that Jeremy had started getting close with. But no matter how much of a caring person Michael was, right now Jeremy came first.

 

Jeremy’s voice was not among the collection of screams - and he’d recognize Jeremy’s distinct voice anywhere - so he needed to find him asap. If what he suspected was true, then everyone in the cast had been SQUIPed. If they were screaming, then Jeremy either had something to do with it or would have fallen victim to the same thing.

 

Either way, it was very important that Michael find him.

 

He walked further into the room and was even about to leave to search elsewhere when he saw a tuft of light brown hair from behind a table. He ran around it to see Jeremy collapsed on the ground. In his hand was an empty alprazolam bottle. Michael paled and ran towards his friend, completely forgot the Mountain Dew.

 

He pulled Jeremy’s limp body into his lap and leaned forward to try and see if Jeremy was breathing. When that turned out to be a negative, he suppressed his panic and pressed shaking fingers to Jeremy’s neck. Jeremy’s skin was cold and clammy, and he held his shaky fingers there for what felt like ages as he desperately searched for a pulse. There wasn’t one to be found.

 

He turned around and yelled at the top of his lungs, “HELP! SOMEONE PLEASE HELP! MY FRIEND ISN’T BREATHING!” There was thunderous footsteps, but Michael wasn’t paying attention. He was too busy desperately trying to revive his friend and cursing himself for not taking those CPR classes; even though he knew it wouldn’t have changed anything.

 

Jeremy was cold, and the people who’d arrived were his classmates and a single teacher. Christine had quickly called the paramedics, however, they were too far away for them to get here in time.

 

He’d made his entrance too late. Out of the corner of his eyes and through the blurry tears he saw Brook take the Mountain Dew Red and hide it behind her back, her eyes cold and calculating despite the somber expression on her face. No tears had been shed.

 

Over the loud noise of the room as audience saw the dead body, the opening of the carbonated bottle seemed almost too loud. It was like the sound from one of the stupid commercials. Brook - or who was wearing Brook’s face - made eye contact with him as she poured the Mountain Dew Red into the trash behind her.

**Author's Note:**

> Yes it didn't work. The screams were just the SQUIPs loosing power or some shit... possibly transferring to Brook just for shits and giggles. Gotta recollect or something. Maybe to lead Jeremy to believe he won? Or to draw Michaels attention for those last few seconds.
> 
> want more BMC angst? Well just comment below cuz I have some ideas that I can write for this...


End file.
